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September 25, 2005


Sarah, the evil twin

Can I tell you we have more in common than we knew? I am COMPLETELY in sync w/you on the death and dying thing.
My dad died about 13 years ago. He & mom had recently been out to eat (at Friendly's, his FAVE restaurant of all time, so help me) and they saw the local undertaker. Dad tells mom they have to go talk to him soon, to "lock in" a price for their funerals. That was dad, and I AM his daughter. We laughed until we cried when the time came to sit down with the funeral director (Digger) and plan the service. Vets get a free stone marker from the Armed Svcs; they put name, DOB, DOD, and rank when you left the service. They also put a cross or a Star of David on there. Dad was Episcopalian, sort of. His dad was a raging bigot (glad I never knew grandpa). Soooo - we thought perhaps it would be a nice touch to add the Star instead of the cross, just as a little joke for dad and his forebears (hope using the Star as the punchline of a joke is not offensive - no offense intended).
We threw him a great funeral, lots of friends, food and jokes. Hung up hundreds of pictures of him all around, the good the bad and the ugly. And it was a great good-bye.
I think you are right on target w/your reactions to the way we treat death in this country. Way too sanitized ("under your care" should not be allowed to be used when referring to a dead person), and we all seem afraid of it. But not you, I can see. If you do not outlive me, I expect I will parade through the French Quarter for your send-off, throwing sb embellishments to the crowd and laughing til I cry.


Renee - you always manage to make me laugh!! I have a friend in SLC whose could give you some tips on transporting bodies. She did n't have a Suburban so she used a truck! Keep the good thought my friend!


I totally agree--I believe funerals, while sad for those grieving their loss, should be a celebration of LIFE. Thanks for the reminder, Renee!


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